myrtle ave...party central
so, just a quick update about the "block party" last night. has anyone ever heard the song "i wanna fuck you" by plies featuring akon and snoop? well...we have. in factt we've heard it approximately 637,000 times, all last night. what i thought was a block party was actually just some bushwick thugs showing off their hot cars and their ridiculous stereo systems.
i decided to crawl into bed around 2:30 last night hoping i would be able to block out the mayhem, but unfortunately suz woke up as i did so. she had already been asleep for a solid two hours so after stumbling nude to the bathroom and returning to bed she was partly rested from her previous two hour nap and completely unfettered by drowsiness. the music proved to be too much to block out and as it persisted while we laid awake in bed we soon gave up on the prospect of sleep. i lit a cigarette and pulled up a window seat where i had a great view of the neighborhood activity. i soon discovered that there was a method to this mayhem. the music would play as loudly as possible until a cop neared at which point the car trunk would be slammed shut (where the subwoofers reside) and the volume turned down while the rest of the bystanders would linger looking quite innocent on the sidewalk. the music would stay off for a while until some other car came by blasting its own music at which point my streetbound neighbors would throw open all the doors and crank the music again. it was a stereo-showdown and everytime this territorial ritual was initiated they would play the same song. it was awesome. truly a sight to be seen, or rather, heard. each time i heard "i wanna fuck you" i thought about how great it would be if i owned a paintball gun that i could stealthily point out the window and unload on the unsuspecting audio-intruders. i fear that this sort of behavior might get me actually shot, so i doubt the dream will ever come to frution.
at one point, suzanne even called the local police station to lodge a noise complaint, but unfortunately there were real crimes going on in bushwick and they had little time, or concern for noise complaints.
once we had completely given up on sleep we curled up on the couch to watch a simpsons. we usually watch the simpsons with the volume set to about 28 or so and only turn it up to 31 when the train comes by. last night we had it up all the way to 35! 35 people! and we still couldn't hear the deliciously witty dialogue over the stereo system of someone who was parked nearly a block away. it was unreal.
at approximately 4:15 the streets cleared and at last it seemed we could resume our slumber. we decided that all of our friends had to return to their parents' basements or garages to celebrate 4:20 in the morning before the night could really be called complete.
it was a fun adventure in late-night, late-summer urban celebration. i only pray that if any of you visit you'll have the privilege of its experience.
and now, so you can share in our misery, the lyrics:
[Akon:] Convict!
[Plies:] Plies!
[Akon:] Convict...Music...and you know we a front.
[Chorus: Akon]
I see you windin n grindin up on that pole,
I kno u see me lookin' at you and you already kno
I wanna fuck you, you already know, i wanna fuck you, you already kno
[Verse 1: Plies]
I wanna sit u ????
and show u what a real nigga wit money do
I'm caked up and well respected wit shit to prove
to be straight up with cha I wanna fuck u
I'm a street nigaa so u kno I aint ???
want u to bust it open so I can drop tht dick in ya
I'm thug nd x-rated plus I'm a real nigga
I wanna lay tht pussy I dont want ur fone numba
I wanna take u to the crib and fuck u to sleep
I let u get a lil rest and wake u up and beat
I bet a stack u aint met a nigga fuck betta than me
and I have bitches swear 2 god I was on three
[Chorus]
[Verse 2: Snoop]
Money in the air as mo feel grad you by your coat tail take you to the motel, hoe sale,
dont tell, wont tell, baby said I dont talk dogg but she told on me, oh well,
take a picture wit me, what the flick gon do, baby stick to me & ima stick on u,
if u pick me then ima pick on you, d-o-double g and im here to put this dick on you,
I'm stuck on pussy n urs is right, wrip ridinin them poles and them doors is tight
and ima get me a shot for the end of the night cuz pussy is pussy and baby ur pussy for life.
[Chorus]
[Verse 3: Plies]
Let me fill u up wit liquor and fuck it out cha,
lay u flat on ur back and get tht noise out ya,
feel it in ya stomach tearin tht back up out cha
I wanna hear u moan baby I wanna hear u holla,
dont worry about ya hair do I'll shoot u a few dollas,
just when u start ridin me get on them toes for me,
I dont like a quiet fuck so tell me how u want it,
u needa act like its yurr dick while u on it,
I kno I'mma freak baby nd im luvin dat,
now I needa get u on the same level where im at,
but when I get ya out there aint no turnin back,
and I'mma take u from likin' it to lovin sex.
[Chorus]
[Verse 4: Plies]
And if the pussy good I'll fuck ya a week straight,
and meet ya at ya crib and fuck u on ya lunch break,
cuz I'mma stay up in dat pussy till ur numb babe,
and put tears in yur eyes and a smile on ya face,
gimme dat pussy one time thts all it takes,
and I'mma treat u like a big girl okayy,
and I can tell u even then i can see ya legs shake,
and at tht point imma give it to u all the way,
cuz I'mma make u wanna fuck me erryday,
fuck me at ya own risk is wht I'm tryenna say,
cuz I'mma have ur nose? wide open after dis,
nd make ur panties get wet wen u think about the dick,
u wanna leave me alone but u cant quit,
wheneva I aint in that pussy u feel sick,
the more times I get it the better it get,
so next time u see me think about dis.
[Chorus]
[Verse 5: Akon]
Shorty I can see u aint lonely handfull of niggas n they all got cheese,
so u lookin at me now whats it gonna be just another tease far as I can see,
tryin get u up out this club if it means spendin' a couple dubs,
throwin bout 30 stacks in the back make it rain like that cuz I'm far from a scrub,
u kno my pedigree, ex-deala use to move phetamines,
girl I spend money like it dont mean nuthin n besides I got a thing for u.
[Chorus]
[Verse 6: Snoop]
Mobbin' through club in low pressin im sittin in the back in the smokers section (just smokin),
birds eye, I got a clear view, you cant see me but I can see u (baby I see u),
its cool we jet the mood is set,
your pussy is wet u rubbin your back and touchin your neck,
ur body is movin' u humpin' n jumpin' ur titties is bouncin' u smilin' n grinin' n lookin at me.
[Verse 7: Akon]
Girl n while your looking at me im ready to hit the caddy right up on the patio move the patty to the caddy,
baby u got a phatty the type i like to marry wantin to just give u everythin n thats kinda scary,
cuz I'm lovin the way you shake your ass , bouncin', got me tippin' my glass,
lil' mully dont get caught up to fast but i got a thing for you.
[Chorus x2]
[Akon:] Girl...
i decided to crawl into bed around 2:30 last night hoping i would be able to block out the mayhem, but unfortunately suz woke up as i did so. she had already been asleep for a solid two hours so after stumbling nude to the bathroom and returning to bed she was partly rested from her previous two hour nap and completely unfettered by drowsiness. the music proved to be too much to block out and as it persisted while we laid awake in bed we soon gave up on the prospect of sleep. i lit a cigarette and pulled up a window seat where i had a great view of the neighborhood activity. i soon discovered that there was a method to this mayhem. the music would play as loudly as possible until a cop neared at which point the car trunk would be slammed shut (where the subwoofers reside) and the volume turned down while the rest of the bystanders would linger looking quite innocent on the sidewalk. the music would stay off for a while until some other car came by blasting its own music at which point my streetbound neighbors would throw open all the doors and crank the music again. it was a stereo-showdown and everytime this territorial ritual was initiated they would play the same song. it was awesome. truly a sight to be seen, or rather, heard. each time i heard "i wanna fuck you" i thought about how great it would be if i owned a paintball gun that i could stealthily point out the window and unload on the unsuspecting audio-intruders. i fear that this sort of behavior might get me actually shot, so i doubt the dream will ever come to frution.
at one point, suzanne even called the local police station to lodge a noise complaint, but unfortunately there were real crimes going on in bushwick and they had little time, or concern for noise complaints.
once we had completely given up on sleep we curled up on the couch to watch a simpsons. we usually watch the simpsons with the volume set to about 28 or so and only turn it up to 31 when the train comes by. last night we had it up all the way to 35! 35 people! and we still couldn't hear the deliciously witty dialogue over the stereo system of someone who was parked nearly a block away. it was unreal.
at approximately 4:15 the streets cleared and at last it seemed we could resume our slumber. we decided that all of our friends had to return to their parents' basements or garages to celebrate 4:20 in the morning before the night could really be called complete.
it was a fun adventure in late-night, late-summer urban celebration. i only pray that if any of you visit you'll have the privilege of its experience.
and now, so you can share in our misery, the lyrics:
[Akon:] Convict!
[Plies:] Plies!
[Akon:] Convict...Music...and you know we a front.
[Chorus: Akon]
I see you windin n grindin up on that pole,
I kno u see me lookin' at you and you already kno
I wanna fuck you, you already know, i wanna fuck you, you already kno
[Verse 1: Plies]
I wanna sit u ????
and show u what a real nigga wit money do
I'm caked up and well respected wit shit to prove
to be straight up with cha I wanna fuck u
I'm a street nigaa so u kno I aint ???
want u to bust it open so I can drop tht dick in ya
I'm thug nd x-rated plus I'm a real nigga
I wanna lay tht pussy I dont want ur fone numba
I wanna take u to the crib and fuck u to sleep
I let u get a lil rest and wake u up and beat
I bet a stack u aint met a nigga fuck betta than me
and I have bitches swear 2 god I was on three
[Chorus]
[Verse 2: Snoop]
Money in the air as mo feel grad you by your coat tail take you to the motel, hoe sale,
dont tell, wont tell, baby said I dont talk dogg but she told on me, oh well,
take a picture wit me, what the flick gon do, baby stick to me & ima stick on u,
if u pick me then ima pick on you, d-o-double g and im here to put this dick on you,
I'm stuck on pussy n urs is right, wrip ridinin them poles and them doors is tight
and ima get me a shot for the end of the night cuz pussy is pussy and baby ur pussy for life.
[Chorus]
[Verse 3: Plies]
Let me fill u up wit liquor and fuck it out cha,
lay u flat on ur back and get tht noise out ya,
feel it in ya stomach tearin tht back up out cha
I wanna hear u moan baby I wanna hear u holla,
dont worry about ya hair do I'll shoot u a few dollas,
just when u start ridin me get on them toes for me,
I dont like a quiet fuck so tell me how u want it,
u needa act like its yurr dick while u on it,
I kno I'mma freak baby nd im luvin dat,
now I needa get u on the same level where im at,
but when I get ya out there aint no turnin back,
and I'mma take u from likin' it to lovin sex.
[Chorus]
[Verse 4: Plies]
And if the pussy good I'll fuck ya a week straight,
and meet ya at ya crib and fuck u on ya lunch break,
cuz I'mma stay up in dat pussy till ur numb babe,
and put tears in yur eyes and a smile on ya face,
gimme dat pussy one time thts all it takes,
and I'mma treat u like a big girl okayy,
and I can tell u even then i can see ya legs shake,
and at tht point imma give it to u all the way,
cuz I'mma make u wanna fuck me erryday,
fuck me at ya own risk is wht I'm tryenna say,
cuz I'mma have ur nose? wide open after dis,
nd make ur panties get wet wen u think about the dick,
u wanna leave me alone but u cant quit,
wheneva I aint in that pussy u feel sick,
the more times I get it the better it get,
so next time u see me think about dis.
[Chorus]
[Verse 5: Akon]
Shorty I can see u aint lonely handfull of niggas n they all got cheese,
so u lookin at me now whats it gonna be just another tease far as I can see,
tryin get u up out this club if it means spendin' a couple dubs,
throwin bout 30 stacks in the back make it rain like that cuz I'm far from a scrub,
u kno my pedigree, ex-deala use to move phetamines,
girl I spend money like it dont mean nuthin n besides I got a thing for u.
[Chorus]
[Verse 6: Snoop]
Mobbin' through club in low pressin im sittin in the back in the smokers section (just smokin),
birds eye, I got a clear view, you cant see me but I can see u (baby I see u),
its cool we jet the mood is set,
your pussy is wet u rubbin your back and touchin your neck,
ur body is movin' u humpin' n jumpin' ur titties is bouncin' u smilin' n grinin' n lookin at me.
[Verse 7: Akon]
Girl n while your looking at me im ready to hit the caddy right up on the patio move the patty to the caddy,
baby u got a phatty the type i like to marry wantin to just give u everythin n thats kinda scary,
cuz I'm lovin the way you shake your ass , bouncin', got me tippin' my glass,
lil' mully dont get caught up to fast but i got a thing for you.
[Chorus x2]
[Akon:] Girl...
posted by R. Peeps at 2:53 PM
4 Comments:
Wow. There have been a handful of situations in my life that were so outrageously annoyingly absurd that I coud do nothing but laugh. (Maniacally.) I suspect this was one of them for you?
Paintball gun = high-larious.
this was indeed one of those situations...for me at least. suzanne didn't find it very funny until it was over.
And I thought the train would be the thing keeping you up...damn...
BTW - in reference to your model of giovanni, perhaps you could enlighten your bass-addicted neighbors that their demonstrations provide a perfect contemporary analog to the sexual conquerer. If they didn't follow and catch your drift (which may be for the best), I bet they'll get a kick out of it and stop shaking buildings and have a communal circle of ego stroking.
absolutely hilarious. you should have shot them all.. of course the part that caught my eye was the part about suzanne "stumbling nude" to the bathroom.
*clutches tummy and giggles* :P
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