Away from home
christmas is over, and not surprisingly it was accompanied with that anti-climactic feeling of "what just happened" after the presents were all evaluated and judged and the wrappings littered the floor. this year was a bit more anti-climactic than i'm used to because it was an entirely new experience.
this year, i spent christmas in california with suzanne's family. i had fun and enjoyed the holiday spirit, but in the wake of christmasses past, it lacked a few key components. this year, christmas dinner was a casual onslaught of appetizers and finger foods, presents were all opened on christmas eve and after the presents were opened, the night was over. this was at about 9:30 in the evening, and suzanne's sister packed up her new toys and headed back to her house. envy now washes over me because she has her own place to go back to, whereas suzanne and i are forced to endure 48 hours straight of christmas bliss. and that was pretty much it, all the fun of christmas packed into 3 hours on christmas eve. nobody really felt like going to church, so instead suz and i had a bit of meditation time out in the back yard, staring up at the moon and listening contemplatively to the world around us. this, i enjoyed quite thoroughly, because midnight mass, while part of the christmas ritual, never really gave me a sense of satisfaction, but this did.
and that was it. christmas day was spent lounging. everyone said they were recovering from the torrent of holiday glee, but there were only three hours of holiday glee.
my family christmas is quite different. it starts christmas eve, when my family, my mother's brother and his family and my grandparents all congregate at the ranch house that my grandparents have called home for eons now. my family arrives first and we pile down into the finished basement. you see, the upstairs of the house is reserved for company, and since we're family, we don't count as company. i have spent every single one of my christmas eve's underground in my grandparents' basement, except for the brief stint when my family lived in virginia.
once we get down to the basement, its a mad dash for the bar that my grandfather has. ever since i was old enough to have a bit of wine mixed with ginger ale at the dinner table (13) i have been working on being the family bartender. now i can say that the position is officially mine. so, when we make it to the bar, i whip up a quick round of 7 and 7's (the family drink of choice) for all that are interested. and if you aren't having that, you better be drinking some vino. my grandfather affectionately refers to wine as gasoline or turpentine and several times throughout the meal to come he will turn to me with his empty glass in hand and say in a thick italian accent, "eh, robert, i need a littla bit mora the turpentine." i think the implication is that the wine either powers him like gasoline, or cleans his inner workings like turpentine. either way, its hilarious and will continue to be until the day i die.
eventually my uncle and his family will show up, usually 30 minutes to an hour and a half late. there has never really been an answer as to why this happens, except that my uncle presumably operates on "amico-standard-time" which is my mother's maiden name. once they arrive, i mix up some more drinks and the festivities begin. the platter of pepperoni and cheeses comes out, along with the platter of shrimp coctail and the notorious calamari. for years i couldn't understand putting that stuff in your mouth, but now i realize that the squid is merely a medium by which you can transport the oily, herby dressing that it is bathed in...delicious.
then the real eating begins. my grandmother cooks every bit of the christmas meal, and it usually could serve up to 35 people, though you'll only find 10 at the table. there's pasta, veal, green beans, mushrooms, and an assortment of other italian specialities that i can't remember the names of for the life of me, but the point is that there is a lot of food.
assuming that we sit down to dinner at about 7 or 7:30 we're usually finished by 9:30 or 10...that's a lot of eating, and the wine flows freely while all this i going on. later, pastries and coffee will be served after the presents are opened. in my youth, the presents were the highlight of the evening, and i would spent most of the night begging my grandfather to let us open them, but it was futile, he was solid as a rock in his resolve, and the presents would not be opened until he saw fit. now that i'm older, the presents are less exciting because they aren't toys anymore, they are clothes...boring clothes that usually don't fit, and i usually don't like and usually come from stores that i don't shop at. so, once i get these presents i get to go to the mall, return them for store credit and spend my time trying to find something that i like at abercrombie and fitch. two years ago this translated into a hooded sweatshirt that i gave to suzanne as an ironic gift and a belt for me that i wear almost religiously.
once the presents are done, the paper is cleaned up and coffee is served along with a delicious assortment of cannoli, napoleons, and other puffed pastries from Savoia's which has been fattening my family for two generations now (notice that i capitalized Savoia's, because it is one of the few important things that i consider worthy of capitalization). once everyone is sober and stuffed, and the leftovers have been distributed evenly we pack up and head to our respective houses, this is usually around 12 or 12:30 in the morning on christmas day. we retire to our sleep and wake up the next day, and here's the best part, we do it all over again. my family open's our presents, we have our coffee and breakfasts, we get dressed for the day, and if we didn't go to midnight mass we go after presents are opened. then, if you can believe it, my grandparents come over to my parents' house for another huge meal. its like we play christmas eve in reverse at my parents house so we get to celebrate twice.
this is the type of christmas that i'm used to. i can't say that i'm depressed because i missed it this year, i can only say that i miss it. knowing everything is happening the exact same way comforts me, but doesn't make up for the lack. i look forward to years to come because i doubt many of them will be spent away from family on christmas. and this year, as a surprise, my brother is flying me into rochester after the new year to surprise my parents. so, its not a complete loss because i'm still going to see the lights and the tree and my family. i wouldn't be entirely surprised if a giant family gathering was planned just to relive part of christmas with me around. this isn't pompous, its merely fact. my family has me placed on a golden pedastal probably because i was the first of my generation.
so that's christmas with my family, in a very large nutshell. i can't think of any other way to end this.
merry belated, relived, rehashed, re-analyzed christmas.
this year, i spent christmas in california with suzanne's family. i had fun and enjoyed the holiday spirit, but in the wake of christmasses past, it lacked a few key components. this year, christmas dinner was a casual onslaught of appetizers and finger foods, presents were all opened on christmas eve and after the presents were opened, the night was over. this was at about 9:30 in the evening, and suzanne's sister packed up her new toys and headed back to her house. envy now washes over me because she has her own place to go back to, whereas suzanne and i are forced to endure 48 hours straight of christmas bliss. and that was pretty much it, all the fun of christmas packed into 3 hours on christmas eve. nobody really felt like going to church, so instead suz and i had a bit of meditation time out in the back yard, staring up at the moon and listening contemplatively to the world around us. this, i enjoyed quite thoroughly, because midnight mass, while part of the christmas ritual, never really gave me a sense of satisfaction, but this did.
and that was it. christmas day was spent lounging. everyone said they were recovering from the torrent of holiday glee, but there were only three hours of holiday glee.
my family christmas is quite different. it starts christmas eve, when my family, my mother's brother and his family and my grandparents all congregate at the ranch house that my grandparents have called home for eons now. my family arrives first and we pile down into the finished basement. you see, the upstairs of the house is reserved for company, and since we're family, we don't count as company. i have spent every single one of my christmas eve's underground in my grandparents' basement, except for the brief stint when my family lived in virginia.
once we get down to the basement, its a mad dash for the bar that my grandfather has. ever since i was old enough to have a bit of wine mixed with ginger ale at the dinner table (13) i have been working on being the family bartender. now i can say that the position is officially mine. so, when we make it to the bar, i whip up a quick round of 7 and 7's (the family drink of choice) for all that are interested. and if you aren't having that, you better be drinking some vino. my grandfather affectionately refers to wine as gasoline or turpentine and several times throughout the meal to come he will turn to me with his empty glass in hand and say in a thick italian accent, "eh, robert, i need a littla bit mora the turpentine." i think the implication is that the wine either powers him like gasoline, or cleans his inner workings like turpentine. either way, its hilarious and will continue to be until the day i die.
eventually my uncle and his family will show up, usually 30 minutes to an hour and a half late. there has never really been an answer as to why this happens, except that my uncle presumably operates on "amico-standard-time" which is my mother's maiden name. once they arrive, i mix up some more drinks and the festivities begin. the platter of pepperoni and cheeses comes out, along with the platter of shrimp coctail and the notorious calamari. for years i couldn't understand putting that stuff in your mouth, but now i realize that the squid is merely a medium by which you can transport the oily, herby dressing that it is bathed in...delicious.
then the real eating begins. my grandmother cooks every bit of the christmas meal, and it usually could serve up to 35 people, though you'll only find 10 at the table. there's pasta, veal, green beans, mushrooms, and an assortment of other italian specialities that i can't remember the names of for the life of me, but the point is that there is a lot of food.
assuming that we sit down to dinner at about 7 or 7:30 we're usually finished by 9:30 or 10...that's a lot of eating, and the wine flows freely while all this i going on. later, pastries and coffee will be served after the presents are opened. in my youth, the presents were the highlight of the evening, and i would spent most of the night begging my grandfather to let us open them, but it was futile, he was solid as a rock in his resolve, and the presents would not be opened until he saw fit. now that i'm older, the presents are less exciting because they aren't toys anymore, they are clothes...boring clothes that usually don't fit, and i usually don't like and usually come from stores that i don't shop at. so, once i get these presents i get to go to the mall, return them for store credit and spend my time trying to find something that i like at abercrombie and fitch. two years ago this translated into a hooded sweatshirt that i gave to suzanne as an ironic gift and a belt for me that i wear almost religiously.
once the presents are done, the paper is cleaned up and coffee is served along with a delicious assortment of cannoli, napoleons, and other puffed pastries from Savoia's which has been fattening my family for two generations now (notice that i capitalized Savoia's, because it is one of the few important things that i consider worthy of capitalization). once everyone is sober and stuffed, and the leftovers have been distributed evenly we pack up and head to our respective houses, this is usually around 12 or 12:30 in the morning on christmas day. we retire to our sleep and wake up the next day, and here's the best part, we do it all over again. my family open's our presents, we have our coffee and breakfasts, we get dressed for the day, and if we didn't go to midnight mass we go after presents are opened. then, if you can believe it, my grandparents come over to my parents' house for another huge meal. its like we play christmas eve in reverse at my parents house so we get to celebrate twice.
this is the type of christmas that i'm used to. i can't say that i'm depressed because i missed it this year, i can only say that i miss it. knowing everything is happening the exact same way comforts me, but doesn't make up for the lack. i look forward to years to come because i doubt many of them will be spent away from family on christmas. and this year, as a surprise, my brother is flying me into rochester after the new year to surprise my parents. so, its not a complete loss because i'm still going to see the lights and the tree and my family. i wouldn't be entirely surprised if a giant family gathering was planned just to relive part of christmas with me around. this isn't pompous, its merely fact. my family has me placed on a golden pedastal probably because i was the first of my generation.
so that's christmas with my family, in a very large nutshell. i can't think of any other way to end this.
merry belated, relived, rehashed, re-analyzed christmas.
posted by R. Peeps at 5:29 PM
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